i thot nitetime was supposed to be v peaceful.. well.. i thot again.. and i assume so..but last nite wasn't a peaceful one.. not at all.. had a nitemare again.. and it spoils d whole of my day as well.. there is no logic in it but yet.. parts and parts of it is jus too eerie.. and too empty.. in it..

i was supposedly working with someone(i couldn't see the face.. it was blur..) in a supermarket.. but what we did was to jus wash the plates in the.. supermarket.. den comes the supervisor to tell us to go out for a rest. we did as told and after that we were outside this bunglow.. it seems so that the supermarket is at the basement of the bunglow. but when we were outside, she disappeared... i kept lookin for her but i can't find.... den dunno y.. behind me was a funeral.. with white candles all over on the floor.. no one there at all.. jus the funeral and de coffin that is.. not a single soul.. not even the someone whom i came out from d supermarket with.. and it was so dark... so i ran down to d supermarket but again.. there is no one at all.. i didn't see her.. ran up again.. keep on running and running.. but i jus couldn't find her.. jus when i was abt to realli break down.. i received a message from her but when i opened it.. i woke up.. jus suddenly woke up.. and i never get to 'see' the message.. there is no end for the nitemare i had..

after tt... jus empty.. feelin empty.. once again.. maybe i was tired once again.. but yet.. i've nv stopped thinkin.. and thinkin isn't something that when u say u wan to stop, then it will stop. again and again.. when i think and i can't figure it out.. it spoils my mood.. and now i've figured out why was i affected by this.. it wasn't the funeral that scares me.. it was d part when u search for someone so hard yet u jus cannot nv find her ... as well as the emptiness of that state tat haunts me.. i fear ppl leaving me.. n tt is a v weak pt of me but yet i noe this is wat everyone tend to experience.. at least once in a lifetime.. jus feels that.. i'm kinda lousy.. after all, i'm a human hur..

a v long day today indeed.. v long.. too long.. age is catching up with me.. already got some assignments to do.. and i dunno wat to do.. needs to focus yet not focusing.. but again.. life is also abt trying repeatively.. and i jus hav to keep on trying isn't it..